It's my lucky day. I woke up at seven minutes past seven on the seventh day of the seventh month in the year two-thousand seven. I woke up to the sound of my dog throwing up on the rug in our entry way. How much more fortunate can one man be? I went to see if perhaps she had been yakking up gold coins, or maybe simply announcing the arrival of my lottery winnings.
Wait a minute. I don't play the lottery. I don't tend to go in for games of chance ever since the kid down the street from me opened "Little Vegas" way back when I was about eleven years old. His casino opened in his parents garage, and came complete with rigged roulette wheel and a number of other fixed games. I watched as he bilked the younger kids in the neighborhood for their lunch money. Even now I am amazed at how easily people hand over their money for a chance to get rich quick.
A teacher friend of mine started his vacation by playing the ponies. When I saw him at a pub the other night, he was celebrating the five hundred dollars he had won on horse racing. It occurred to me only briefly to ask him how much he had invested prior to his big payoff, but that seemed like a definite buzzkill. The idea that you could get something for nothing is still awfully appealing.
Many years ago, my father was flying in a friend's small plane to the west coast to visit me, and they stopped in Tahoe, for gas and a little wager. He put five dollars down on the Colorado Avalanche to win the Stanley Cup. This was the kind of thing my father was prone to do, betting with his heart, since the Colorado Avalanche was essentially a brand new franchise, and no NHL team had ever won the Stanley Cup the year after relocating. By the end of the season, my father's dream had come true, and his parlay paid off at fifteen to one. He didn't get to pick that one up. I did. He died on the trip back to Colorado, and never had a chance to see it. I sent the ticket off to Nevada and they mailed me back seventy-five dollars. It only cost me the price of a stamp - and the opportunity to share it with my father. Lucky me.
Saturday, July 07, 2007
Friday, July 06, 2007
School Bored
The headline read: "Oakland school district to regain some powers." My mind immediately began to make a list: heat vision, invisibility, spider-sense, and invulnerability. Alas, this was not to be the case. On July 9 state Superintendent Jack O'Connell is expected to meet with board members and state lawmakers to announce an agreement: the return of board control over an area named "community relations and governance."
For those of you who, like myself, are scratching your heads and asking what exactly is meant by "community relations and governance," the state department of education still will manage the areas of student achievement, staffing, finances and facilities but the board sees symbolic importance in the power transfer. Symbols can be very powerful. The swastika, the smiley face, Hello Kitty. David Kakishiba, president of the school board says, "As opposed to us just sitting on the sidelines, we're going to be articulating what the goals are for the entire district." Again, articulation is very important too. Try saying "rubber baby buggy bumpers" without articulating. The effects can be devastating.
I confess. I'm not really impressed. Oakland Unified still owes about eighty-six million dollars on the state loan that spared the district from bankruptcy. According to its chief financial officer, Javetta Robinson, about thirty million of that amount is in a reserve, collecting interest. There is a pending Assembly bill that would force the state to gradually restore democracy to the Oakland school district, based on periodic progress reports. We could call these benchmarks, and we all know that handing over control to the local government based on progress toward benchmarks is not the kind of accountability we all feel comfortable with. And when I say "we", I mean the Royal We, and I'm referring to his Pinheadness - the man who will let no child be left behind. Sometimes I find it hard to relate to governance, community-wise.
For those of you who, like myself, are scratching your heads and asking what exactly is meant by "community relations and governance," the state department of education still will manage the areas of student achievement, staffing, finances and facilities but the board sees symbolic importance in the power transfer. Symbols can be very powerful. The swastika, the smiley face, Hello Kitty. David Kakishiba, president of the school board says, "As opposed to us just sitting on the sidelines, we're going to be articulating what the goals are for the entire district." Again, articulation is very important too. Try saying "rubber baby buggy bumpers" without articulating. The effects can be devastating.
I confess. I'm not really impressed. Oakland Unified still owes about eighty-six million dollars on the state loan that spared the district from bankruptcy. According to its chief financial officer, Javetta Robinson, about thirty million of that amount is in a reserve, collecting interest. There is a pending Assembly bill that would force the state to gradually restore democracy to the Oakland school district, based on periodic progress reports. We could call these benchmarks, and we all know that handing over control to the local government based on progress toward benchmarks is not the kind of accountability we all feel comfortable with. And when I say "we", I mean the Royal We, and I'm referring to his Pinheadness - the man who will let no child be left behind. Sometimes I find it hard to relate to governance, community-wise.
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Are You Smarter Than A Fourth Grader?
"The price of gasoline dropped nationwide by an average of nearly four cents over the last two weeks, to $1.58 per gallon of self-serve regular, a survey of nearly 7,000 gas stations concluded Sunday."
Test yourself. Before I tell you when this survey was taken, you take a shot at what year this survey was taken. I'll wait here while you ponder this.
Did you guess? Not yet? Did you open up another browser window and ask Al Gore's Internet to give you the answer? It's okay if you did, since that's how I found this report from CNN dated 2003. I wouldn't have imagined that a gallon of gasoline would double in price over four years. Four years before that, the price hovered at $1.20.
A lot has happened in eight years. Even more has happened in the past four. It causes me to reflect on the microcosm of my classroom. Every day, the kids in my class get paid one dollar (classroom currency) for showing up on time, and another for bringing in their homework. Students who don't miss a day and have their homework can bank three hundred and sixty dollars over the course of a school year. What can they use their money for, if they don't want to simply save it? They can buy pencils and erasers for a dollar apiece, but every year the big money maker for Mister Caven is water and trips to the bathroom. At the beginning of the year, "comfort stops" cost the same as a pencil or eraser. As soon as the kids have a few dollars in their pockets, or desks, they feel the urge to spend it. By mid-September, as the demand for trips to the boys' and girls' room increase, so does the price: simple supply and demand. The idea is to try and discourage kids from leaving class for "emergencies" that could have been prevented by taking care of business during recess. By the end of this year, water cost fifteen dollars, and trips to the bathroom were twenty. There were those students who made the connection, and started to rein themselves in, but still others who insisted on living close to the edge. A few kids in my class ended the year owing me money.
What does that mean? First of all, it meant that they weren't eligible for the class store, where we sold giant paper clips, kaleidoscopes, CDs of "Multiplication Rock" and other treasures for ten year olds. It also meant that they spent a year without getting the point. In his State of the Union address in 2006, Pinhead said, "Here we have a serious problem: America is addicted to oil." That was way back when gasoline was lurching past two dollars a gallon. As a nation, are we limiting our "comfort stops"? Not yet. We're just relieved that we don't have to pay seven dollars a gallon like they do in England. The smart kids in my class figure out early that a trip to the drinking fountain costs fifteen dollars, and then usually ends up creating a twenty dollar trip to the bathroom. They'll wait for recess, when it's free.
Test yourself. Before I tell you when this survey was taken, you take a shot at what year this survey was taken. I'll wait here while you ponder this.
Did you guess? Not yet? Did you open up another browser window and ask Al Gore's Internet to give you the answer? It's okay if you did, since that's how I found this report from CNN dated 2003. I wouldn't have imagined that a gallon of gasoline would double in price over four years. Four years before that, the price hovered at $1.20.
A lot has happened in eight years. Even more has happened in the past four. It causes me to reflect on the microcosm of my classroom. Every day, the kids in my class get paid one dollar (classroom currency) for showing up on time, and another for bringing in their homework. Students who don't miss a day and have their homework can bank three hundred and sixty dollars over the course of a school year. What can they use their money for, if they don't want to simply save it? They can buy pencils and erasers for a dollar apiece, but every year the big money maker for Mister Caven is water and trips to the bathroom. At the beginning of the year, "comfort stops" cost the same as a pencil or eraser. As soon as the kids have a few dollars in their pockets, or desks, they feel the urge to spend it. By mid-September, as the demand for trips to the boys' and girls' room increase, so does the price: simple supply and demand. The idea is to try and discourage kids from leaving class for "emergencies" that could have been prevented by taking care of business during recess. By the end of this year, water cost fifteen dollars, and trips to the bathroom were twenty. There were those students who made the connection, and started to rein themselves in, but still others who insisted on living close to the edge. A few kids in my class ended the year owing me money.
What does that mean? First of all, it meant that they weren't eligible for the class store, where we sold giant paper clips, kaleidoscopes, CDs of "Multiplication Rock" and other treasures for ten year olds. It also meant that they spent a year without getting the point. In his State of the Union address in 2006, Pinhead said, "Here we have a serious problem: America is addicted to oil." That was way back when gasoline was lurching past two dollars a gallon. As a nation, are we limiting our "comfort stops"? Not yet. We're just relieved that we don't have to pay seven dollars a gallon like they do in England. The smart kids in my class figure out early that a trip to the drinking fountain costs fifteen dollars, and then usually ends up creating a twenty dollar trip to the bathroom. They'll wait for recess, when it's free.
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
Codependence Day
"Just say goodbye it's Independence Day
It's Independence Day this time" - Bruce Springsteen
Say goodbye to high expectations. Welcome to a country where the dreams are mediated by the people in charge. There is an old saw about "We get the government we deserve" and that thought has been knocking around my head for the past few days. A lot can be made of the results of the past two presidential elections, but the simple truth is, it never should have been that close - not unless a mighty large portion of the voters who are both registered and drag themselves to the polls didn't want a Pinhead to be the leader of the free world.
Today we have five hundred and sixty-five days left of the Cheney regime, and I confess that by acknowledging that I have fallen into the same pit I am complaining about. This government no longer serves the majority of the people that it represents. We live in an oligarchy, maintained by a group of wealthy white men. As we approach another presidential election (and since the violent overthrow of oppressive governments is something that we thrust on other countries), I find it odd that we are now getting regular updates from the campaign trail not about the new ideas that are being put forth by the candidates, but by the amount of money that each of our lucky contestants has been able to raise. Is this the leading indicator of potential political success?
We can express outrage and frustration, but there is no tea in the harbor. The reason we hear all those shots is because they're being heard around the world. The solutions don't rest on the shoulders of the politicians, they rest on the shoulders of the people (we) who elect them. Celebrate your independence and exercise your first amendment right to ask for something more - something better.
"This land is your land" - Woody Guthrie
It's Independence Day this time" - Bruce Springsteen
Say goodbye to high expectations. Welcome to a country where the dreams are mediated by the people in charge. There is an old saw about "We get the government we deserve" and that thought has been knocking around my head for the past few days. A lot can be made of the results of the past two presidential elections, but the simple truth is, it never should have been that close - not unless a mighty large portion of the voters who are both registered and drag themselves to the polls didn't want a Pinhead to be the leader of the free world.
Today we have five hundred and sixty-five days left of the Cheney regime, and I confess that by acknowledging that I have fallen into the same pit I am complaining about. This government no longer serves the majority of the people that it represents. We live in an oligarchy, maintained by a group of wealthy white men. As we approach another presidential election (and since the violent overthrow of oppressive governments is something that we thrust on other countries), I find it odd that we are now getting regular updates from the campaign trail not about the new ideas that are being put forth by the candidates, but by the amount of money that each of our lucky contestants has been able to raise. Is this the leading indicator of potential political success?
We can express outrage and frustration, but there is no tea in the harbor. The reason we hear all those shots is because they're being heard around the world. The solutions don't rest on the shoulders of the politicians, they rest on the shoulders of the people (we) who elect them. Celebrate your independence and exercise your first amendment right to ask for something more - something better.
"This land is your land" - Woody Guthrie
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Morning Commute
"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed, by their Creator, with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness."
You remember those words, don't you? They show up right after the introduction to that breakaway best-seller, "The Declaration of Independence". It was some of Tom Jefferson's best work. It was probably what was swirling around the space between Pinhead's ears on Monday when he decided to commute Scooter "Lewis" Libby's sentence in the CIA leak case. As a result, none of the thirty months (two and a half years) will be served by the former chief of staff for Dick "Dick" Cheney. "I respect the jury's verdict," Pinhead said in a written statement (probably in crayon). "But I have concluded that the prison sentence given to Mr. Libby is excessive. Therefore, I am commuting the portion of Mr. Libby's sentence that required him to spend 30 months in prison." The Pinhead-In-Chief left intact a 250,000 dollar fine and two years probation for his conviction of lying and obstructing justice in a probe into the leak of a CIA operative's identity. Libby's Life, Liberty and pursuit of Happiness were also left profoundly intact.
Be honest. You expected this, right? How much lower in the public opinion well could Pinhead go? Why not keep digging? They sent Paris Hilton back to jail. She violated her parole. Scooter obstructed justice. On the bright side, we can all look on this as a test of our nation's strength and resolve to hold itself together as some of the tiniest brains on the planet continue to drive the ship of state downriver toward the obligatory waterfall. Hold on tight!
You remember those words, don't you? They show up right after the introduction to that breakaway best-seller, "The Declaration of Independence". It was some of Tom Jefferson's best work. It was probably what was swirling around the space between Pinhead's ears on Monday when he decided to commute Scooter "Lewis" Libby's sentence in the CIA leak case. As a result, none of the thirty months (two and a half years) will be served by the former chief of staff for Dick "Dick" Cheney. "I respect the jury's verdict," Pinhead said in a written statement (probably in crayon). "But I have concluded that the prison sentence given to Mr. Libby is excessive. Therefore, I am commuting the portion of Mr. Libby's sentence that required him to spend 30 months in prison." The Pinhead-In-Chief left intact a 250,000 dollar fine and two years probation for his conviction of lying and obstructing justice in a probe into the leak of a CIA operative's identity. Libby's Life, Liberty and pursuit of Happiness were also left profoundly intact.
Be honest. You expected this, right? How much lower in the public opinion well could Pinhead go? Why not keep digging? They sent Paris Hilton back to jail. She violated her parole. Scooter obstructed justice. On the bright side, we can all look on this as a test of our nation's strength and resolve to hold itself together as some of the tiniest brains on the planet continue to drive the ship of state downriver toward the obligatory waterfall. Hold on tight!
Monday, July 02, 2007
Sense Of Purpose
This past week I've been teaching my kids about Louis Braille. This always elicits questions about how blind people do certain things. I have been asked twice how blind people drive. This might not seem like such a bright question, but I suppose I should expect it since I have gone out of my way to explain to my students how blind people can do anything that you and I can do, they just have different ways of making it work.
Inevitably, the discussion turns to all the senses, and which ones could we do without. I have had about four times longer to think about this than my students, so here is what I think:
Sight - I have watched "The Miracle Worker" and I've always been impressed by the work that Anne Sullivan was able to do with Helen Keller, but here's the kicker: I watched those movies (both versions). With both eyes, albeit through prescription eyeglasses. The idea that I couldn't see whatever it is my son is excited about when he says, "Look at this," makes me shiver.
Hearing - Certainly there are a number of sounds that I could go without hearing for the rest of my life, but Beethoven's Pastoral Symphony is not one of them. The sounds of my family laughing, snoring, joking. And the list just goes on and on. No thanks, I'll keep my ears.
Touch - At first, it seems like a pretty simple thing to let go, but the feeling of my wife's hand in mine or my son's forehead when he might have a fever aren't trivial bits at all. I don't need my sense of touch as much as I revel in it.
Smell - My mother has not smelled anything for decades. The way she has adapted and survived in a world full of odors has always been mildly inspirational to me. Like sounds, there are plenty of stinky things out there that I could be happy to avoid automatically, but then the smell of a wood fire, or an ocean breeze, or melting chocolate - well, it's that list thing again.
Taste - Now I'm at the end of the traditional list, and I guess I have to pick something, so I'll have to let flavors go. This would be painful for me because there are so many things out there that I have enjoyed tasting for all these years. But this one is more practical. I could still smell them, so I wouldn't be able to relish them in my mouth. Considering the number of foods that I avoid because of my finicky tastes, my family would be happy to be able to move me past this. I would probably eat better as a result.
This is a decision I have not come to lightly. I fully expect the Sense Police (Senses Takers?) to be at my door later this evening - hopefully after I have finished my dinner.
Inevitably, the discussion turns to all the senses, and which ones could we do without. I have had about four times longer to think about this than my students, so here is what I think:
Sight - I have watched "The Miracle Worker" and I've always been impressed by the work that Anne Sullivan was able to do with Helen Keller, but here's the kicker: I watched those movies (both versions). With both eyes, albeit through prescription eyeglasses. The idea that I couldn't see whatever it is my son is excited about when he says, "Look at this," makes me shiver.
Hearing - Certainly there are a number of sounds that I could go without hearing for the rest of my life, but Beethoven's Pastoral Symphony is not one of them. The sounds of my family laughing, snoring, joking. And the list just goes on and on. No thanks, I'll keep my ears.
Touch - At first, it seems like a pretty simple thing to let go, but the feeling of my wife's hand in mine or my son's forehead when he might have a fever aren't trivial bits at all. I don't need my sense of touch as much as I revel in it.
Smell - My mother has not smelled anything for decades. The way she has adapted and survived in a world full of odors has always been mildly inspirational to me. Like sounds, there are plenty of stinky things out there that I could be happy to avoid automatically, but then the smell of a wood fire, or an ocean breeze, or melting chocolate - well, it's that list thing again.
Taste - Now I'm at the end of the traditional list, and I guess I have to pick something, so I'll have to let flavors go. This would be painful for me because there are so many things out there that I have enjoyed tasting for all these years. But this one is more practical. I could still smell them, so I wouldn't be able to relish them in my mouth. Considering the number of foods that I avoid because of my finicky tastes, my family would be happy to be able to move me past this. I would probably eat better as a result.
This is a decision I have not come to lightly. I fully expect the Sense Police (Senses Takers?) to be at my door later this evening - hopefully after I have finished my dinner.
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Canine Conspiracies
A guy rode up behind me this morning and said, "That's the original 'Little Rascals' dog." It took me a moment to come back from my own personal reverie to realize that the was talking about my dog, the one at the end of the leash I was carrying. "They really messed them up." Then I waited for the punch line: "There ain't nothing wrong with pit bulls, really."
I'm used to my dog being seen as everyone's favorite, or least favorite, breed. In many ways, she's a mirror of the society we live in. Little kids want to waddle right up to her and pet the doggie. Some of the older kids start to wonder if she's "a good dog." I suppose that all depends on what your world view is. If your world view extends to the end of your arm and will she bite it, then yes, she is a good dog and she will not bite your hand. Has she rescued blind children from a burning church? No, she's not quite Rin Tin Tin. She protects us from those vile mail carriers who are always trying to give us bills, and she always lets us know that someone is at our door, usually just after they have finished ringing the doorbell. Just recently, she saved me from the dangers of half of my birthday chocolate cake that we foolishly left sitting on the counter under a metal cover. That was the second time my family has been saved from eating some or all of a chocolate cake. Considering what I have been told all my life about the dangers of dogs consuming chocolate, this makes my dog very brave.
Aside from a little German Shepard, Dalmatian, and Cattle Dog, maybe there's a little Lassie in her after all.
I'm used to my dog being seen as everyone's favorite, or least favorite, breed. In many ways, she's a mirror of the society we live in. Little kids want to waddle right up to her and pet the doggie. Some of the older kids start to wonder if she's "a good dog." I suppose that all depends on what your world view is. If your world view extends to the end of your arm and will she bite it, then yes, she is a good dog and she will not bite your hand. Has she rescued blind children from a burning church? No, she's not quite Rin Tin Tin. She protects us from those vile mail carriers who are always trying to give us bills, and she always lets us know that someone is at our door, usually just after they have finished ringing the doorbell. Just recently, she saved me from the dangers of half of my birthday chocolate cake that we foolishly left sitting on the counter under a metal cover. That was the second time my family has been saved from eating some or all of a chocolate cake. Considering what I have been told all my life about the dangers of dogs consuming chocolate, this makes my dog very brave.
Aside from a little German Shepard, Dalmatian, and Cattle Dog, maybe there's a little Lassie in her after all.
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