Clique Bait

 I may be looking at things from the wrong perspective. I am a sixty-one year old white male, and I am trying to comprehend the minds of fifth grade girls. The same girls who just a few months ago were happy to spend their Tuesday afternoons in the leadership group I run from three to four. This past semester it was a group comprised almost exclusively of these same girls. They learned about community and working as a team. And for that perhaps I should only blame myself that they found the courage to leave me behind. 

I should remember how the evolution of your average fifth grade girls runs. They become socially adept far more quickly than their male counterparts. While the boys are focused on the rudimentary aspects of team sports, with varied success, the collective that becomes our promotional speakers and student council representatives are moving forward. 

Quickly. 

So quickly, in fact, that it always catches me unaware. And it breaks my heart. A little. These girls who were eager for my approval and advice are now relying on one another for social interactions that leave me feeling left behind. The boys continue to need me for the things they always did: getting balls off the roof, walking them back to class after they raced out in a fit of pique. The girls now look to one another to resolve the conflicts that would confound any less developed mind. They understand each other. Which terrifies me just a little.

Then I remember the scary masses of fifth grade girls who came before them, and I am glad that this current group seems to maintain a healthy respect for authority, even if they don't want to be in Mister Caven's Upward Roots group. They have matured, and are ready to move on. This is infinitely preferable to those that insist on being left behind and have no interest in being part of anything. Ever. 

They found themselves, and this is a good thing. Even if it means they don't drop by as often. But I also know a secret: These are the ones who will stop off on their way home from middle school next year. Just to say hello. 

And I'll be glad to see them.