TV Tough

Sadly, it was just a few days ago that I brought you the news of Kirk Douglas' passing. Joining him in heaven this week was Robert Conrad. Mister Conrad will also be remembered as a Hollywood tough guy, even if he was never quite as tough as Kirk. It could be that Bob Conrad's need to be tough stemmed from his compensation for his stature. As a pretty short adult male, I still had him by an inch. This probably had something to do with that series of commercials where he dared us to knock a battery off his shoulder. I was frankly impressed more by his ability to get a D cell Eveready to perch so nicely there.
Robert Conrad was not just a tough battery salesman. He was also the star of Baa Baa Black Sheep, the flying version of McHale's Navy. A band of "screwballs and misfits" who just happen to be extraordinary fighters led by a gruff but lovable commanding officer who plays the game by his own set of rules. A decade before, Bob starred in The Wild Wild West, as the somewhat titular character Jim West. He played a frontier version of James Bond, aided by Artemus Gordon, played by Ross Martin. We knew that Jim West was tough because he wore those tight pants, and still managed to mete out justice before their private train pulled out of the station.
These were the images of Robert Conrad from my youth: TV reruns. It wasn't until I was in high school and caught one of his early big screen entries, Palm Springs Weekend. Initially, I was caught up on the hijinks of Jerry Van Dyke, Dick's banjo playing brother. But soon I was face to face with spoiled rich boy Eric Dean, played by Mister Conrad. He's in Palm Springs trying to get a little action, and hopes to woo Connie Stevens. In all the worst ways. This slick playboy needs a lesson in manners, and this tough weekend on the beach turns out to be just what he needs to grow a conscience. That chip on his shoulder gets knocked off by Ty Hardin, competing for Ms. Steven's affections.
Which is probably how he got into the battery business, replacing the chip with a battery. Robert Conrad was a tan, tough piece of my youth. He stomped on the Terra without every letting that battery slip. He will be missed. Aloha.