Friday, September 28, 2007

Dress Code

MSNBC took a poll back in 2005 to find out who had the ugliest uniforms in the National Football League. The winner, by a fairly wide margin, were the Cleveland Browns. It is likely that the only competition that they might have had would have come from the college ranks, and yes Penn State, I'm looking squarely at you. And I'm wincing.
Interestingly enough, the uniforms that most fans said they liked were those worn by the Dallas Cowboys. Interesting because I am no longer sure just exactly what the uniform of the Dallas Cowboys looks like. They have so very many varieties and alternatives, that I wonder if Tom Landry would know which sideline to stand on if he happened to wander into Texas Stadium these days. This is, after all, the hip thing to do. There is a home jersey, an away jersey, an alternate home jersey, a holiday jersey, and any number of pants and socks and - well, you get the picture. The very idea of having anything "uniform" (as in "not varying or variable"). Add to this the nauseating trend of including "throwback" uniforms (as in "Gee, these things are so ugly, we should throw them back"), and you could spend weeks and several thousand dollars trying to keep up with your favorite team's new (or old) look.
Because that's the idea, after all. The NFL is all about merchandising. I am curious to know how many Michael Vick jerseys were sold earlier this year simply so they could be fed to hungry pit bulls. No matter, since the color that matters most is green, and not that odd astro-turfish green of the Philadelphia Eagles. I'm talking about cash money, but not the newly designed alternative bills that are currently all the rage.

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