Sunday, September 09, 2007

Restoring Our Family Dignity

As miserably embarrassed as I was yesterday with my own deplorable conduct, there is a light on the horizon: My son. While I know that it is potentially dangerous to put undue pressure on your children with expectations of behavior that make you proud, it was a happy moment when I heard him recount the story from his Thursday at school.
In the second week of school, it became my son's responsibility to help shepherd a kindergarten boy to school each day. As a fifth grader, he is more than capable of showing this kid around, and making sure that he gets where he needs to go. What's more, he didn't flinch or moan or whine about "having to do" this chore. Instead, he took it on with the same straight-faced determination that we have become familiar in the case of things such as practicing the piano or cleaning his room. He knows it's his job.
Thursday morning came, and the routine was becoming fairly clear, except at the moment that this little boy was trying to negotiate the big front door at the school with an extra-wide backpack, and he got a little tangled up. My son helped get him through, but not before a voice from behind complained, "Geez, what kind of stupid kid doesn't know how to open a door?" Had he thought about it for a second, my son might not have chosen to close the door on the foot of the owner of the sneering voice, but that's what he did. The fourth grade girl wasn't hurt, but made plenty of noise when she sensed danger, and it was, unfortunately right next to the Principal's office. The school's secretary came right out to see what all the fuss was about, and my son was already contrite to the point of tears. He apologized and went immediately to the row of chairs in the office where he awaited dispensation from the principal.
In the end, he was deemed to be properly remorseful for his actions, and since there was no actual injury, he returned to his class with a warning about setting a good example for younger students and to think before he acts. What they couldn't tell him was that they were proud of him for sticking up for his kindergarten buddy. As a teacher, I know that it would have been impossible for them to cheer on the schoolyard justice that had just been handed out. The girl is a pest and fussbudget of quantum proportions and would probably benefit greatly from a job just like the one my son has. She should be the one making sure that kindergarten kids get where they need to be. I also know why she won't be asked. She's not the responsible one. My son is.

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