Monday, April 17, 2017

That Blowed Up Real Good

That sound we all thought might be saber-rattling could be loose marbles in the head of our "President." I am hip enough to the ways of the world to know that the "Mother of All Bombs" that was unleashed by U.S. forces on a remote portion of Afghanistan was not created in a Trump Industries lab. It has been in development and under wraps for a decade or so, waiting for the perfect time and place to set it off. The non-nuclear 21,600-pound GBU-43/B Massive Ordnance Air Blast Bomb (MOAB) "targeted a system of tunnels and caves that ISIS fighters use to move around freely," White House press secretary Sean Spicer said. It should be noted that Secretary Spicer didn't make any equivalencies to Hitler in his statement. Way to keep it real, Sean!
This detonation comes in the wake of last week's launch of a few dozen cruise missiles into what our "President" was reminded by an interviewer was not Iraq but Syria. The attack took place for the "President" over a delicious piece of chocolate cake. Who doesn't like chocolate cake? Who doesn't like cruise missiles? 
Well, the folks at ground zero. The airfield that was bombed in Syria (not Iraq) was heavily damaged, but not enough to keep further attacks from being launched just a couple days later. The fifty-nine cruise missiles killed an estimated eighty-six bad guys. At one thousand pounds per warhead, that's more than a two-for-one ratio. The "MOAB" used in Afghanistan killed a reported thirty-six bad guys. That's just about one and a half bad guys per pound. I'm sure this probably put a damper on whatever dessert our "President" was consuming at the time of that explosion. "Does this Twinkie taste funny to you?"
Then there's that word "target." A bomb that has a blast radius of more than a mile in every direction is not exactly a precision device. The goat herder who strayed with his flock into the kill zone probably would have ended up joining ISIS eventually, so we can just add him to the total carnage and move on.
To where? How about North Korea? "We are sending an armada," says our "President" in between bites of the most delicious cheesecake. 

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