Friday, October 03, 2014


Come in, Mister Parker. Have a seat. Sorry about the wait.
"That's okay, I was just kind of hanging around."
Let's see, according to your file here, it appears you are having some trouble with the league?
"I'm not affiliated with the Justice League. Or the Avengers. I'm kind of a free agent."
Well, if you haven't considered the advantages of belonging to a union. We offer very attractive options, such as the legal representation you seem to be seeking currently.
"Thanks you Mister..."
Attlau. Byron Attlau. My firm has been representing people such as yourself for some time, and we are aware of most of the peculiarities of the kind of work you do.
"Mister Attlau, I'm really only here because my aunt would have a heart attack if she knew the kind of work I really do."
Really? What is it that your sainted Aunt, May is it, thinks you do?
"She thinks I'm a mild-mannered student and freelance photographer."
Dressed like that?
"This isn't how I go walking around the street."
Yes, I can imagine that you probably don't walk much of anywhere. Is it flying?
"No. Mostly crawling. And swinging. From a line of web that I can shoot from these special -"
That is unfortunate, since flight is something we can include as a pre-existing condition. But we seem to be straying from the actual reason for your visit. There was some, ah, trouble with your lady friend? A Miss Stacy?
Accidental death?
But that's not how the authorities are spinning it, if you'll pardon the pun. They hold you accountable for Miss Stacy's fall from a precipitous height. Snapped her neck?
"I tried to save her. I caught her before she hit the ground."
Maybe it would have been better to simply let her fall. Nature taking its course. Physics, don't you know.
"What are you saying?"
I'm just saying that if you start interfering with the course of natural events, you can sometimes end up on the short end of the stick. Tell me, was there any security video taken of the incident?
"I don't know."
Well, in this town, you can't be too careful. I remember when we helped a client up in Gotham City when it looked like he might be brought up on charges for killing some wacko in a purple suit. It wasn't easy, but once we got the public on our side, he pretty much walked away from it. Reputation intact.
"Are you suggesting that we should try and cover up what really happened? I'm innocent."
Aren't we all? I'm merely suggesting that with the right group behind you, this could all go away in a matter of weeks. A couple months, tops.
"Alright. What do I have to do?"
All you have to do is sign up here, and we'll do the rest. And in the meantime, please try and tone down the whole "amazing" thing. That red and blue suit, for one thing. Have you thought about going to something in black? Very slimming.

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