Sexiest Man Alive?
I'm not on the list. Happily, I am not on the Sexiest Dead Men either, so I have that going for me. But it does give me pause, in this era of #MeToo that we continue to sell magazines and launch a million Tweets about this peculiar distinction.
A long time ago, Rod Stewart asked the musical question, "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy?" I suspect that back in the day, this was a rhetorical question. Now that Rod is known more as a model train enthusiast than a swinging disco god, the point is essentially moot. Unless you're into that kind of thing. Which raises the point, "Who gets to decide such things?"
Currently, singer, songwriter, producer, actor, and philanthropist John Legend has been awarded the title. Congratulations may be the last thing that need to offered to Mister Legend for this distinction. Being viewed as an object by the publishers of People Magazine seems to confuse the talents of their object with his inability to stay out of a swimming pool while fully clothed or his struggle to button his jacket before knotting his bow tie. This brings to mind all those photo shoots of women in various states of undress for various publications in various levels of absurdity. Here's Plaything of the Minute watering plants at home in her dainty underthings. We've got Object of the Moment checking her SAT scores on her home computer which just happens to be next to the Jacuzzi. And so on. The ridiculousness of all of that is not leveled by putting a man in similarly ridiculous circumstances. If a picture is worth a thousand words, then John Legend is a few thousand words behind in terms of legitimizing his career again. I have been amused by the reactions posted by Mister Legend's wife, Chrissy Tiegen: "The sexiest man alive just made me a ham sandwich." This is the kind of perspective we all need. Matthew McConaughey, George Clooney, Bradley Cooper, and the list goes on. These gentlemen have managed to maintain a career this side of cheesecake since being deemed sexy by a publication whose journalistic cred is based almost exclusively on "what's hot and what's not."
And yes, you may correctly assume that I am still stinging from the aforementioned lack of inclusion on any of those lists for all these years. And relieved at the same time. Now I can return to my obsession with model railroads.