Friday, June 28, 2013

The Voice Of Experience

I've never been a huge Brett Favre fan. It might have to do with that obtusely spelled last name, or more likely, the fact that he never wore the orange and blue of my beloved Broncos. On the other hand, he didn't play for the Raiders, Chiefs, or Chargers, teams that would have instantly landed him on the enemies list. He was the opposing quarterback in Super Bowl Thirty-Two, so I got a chance to warm up to sneering at Mister Fav-ray.
But it was after that game when I really began to wonder how anybody could love Brett. Even for those die-hard Packer fans who saw him lead their team back to greatness, it must have stung them when he toyed with their collective affections, waiting to announce his retirement, then reconsidering, then finally taking his show on the road: first to New York and then to division rival Minnesota. It sent a message to football fans that this was a guy who cared most deeply about himself.
Which may explain his alleged treatment of the women he worked with while he was a member of the New York Jets franchise. The idea of a professional athlete straying beyond the polite bounds of courtship and dating is nothing new, but Brett was texting pictures of his junk before Anthony Weiner. He was ahead of the curve.
Maybe it had something to do with the fact that he was, for a period of time, he was addicted to painkillers. His habit was bad enough that it gave him a seizure, and a trip to the rehab clinic back in 1996. This, in turn, may be why he feels qualified to become the pitchman for Rx Pro, a pain relief cream that he believes could have eliminated his need for all those painful surgeries and procedures back in his playing days. "I can speak volumes on pain and narcotics use," Favre told SiriusXM hosts Jim Miller and Bruce Murray, noting his addiction to painkillers. Rx Pro, he said, "is a safe way to treat some of your ailments. It even works with cramps, stomach pain...It's just endless what will happen with this product and this company."
Yes, sports fans, from the man who redefined "endless" with his "will he or won't he" retirement roulette, comes a new definition. This new cream can take away pain caused by years of abuse. Maybe he should try applying it to his mouth. Or directly to Aaron Hernandez.

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