Your "President" would like the Department of Justice to investigate the New York Times to uncover the identity of the Op-Ed piece written a week ago by a senior White House Aide. If the full weight of all that jurisprudence down on that miscreant, it would make everyone's head spin.
Of course, somebody would have to figure out just exactly what law had been broken in order to send out the dogs.
The whole thing starts to reek a little of a bad whodunit. All those faces crowded into a room, each one eyeing the other with murderous intent. All of that loyalty being tested, minute by minute as the would-be sleuths do their best to crack the case. Men tugging at their collars, women at their hemlines as temperatures begin to rise. Telltale moisture beginning to form on the upper lip of those who have the most to lose.
But who has the most to gain?
Or maybe the babysitter who keeps answering the phone, getting garbled noise on the other end, something about amorality and impetuous leadership. And somewhere in the middle of the night, the phone rings again, this time it's Jeff Sessions telling that orange-haired babysitter that the calls are coming from within that very house.
Meanwhile, Bob Woodward, who knows a thing or two about impetuous leadership and amorality inside a White House, has been happy to raise a hand and sign copies of his book. The title of which is Fear: Trump in the White House, which should go a long way to clearing up just how he feels about this particular administration. How he feels as well as a great many appointees and hired hands in that group of mildly recalcitrant members of a government trolley gone off its tracks. "Crazytown," if we are to believe any (or all) of what Mister Woodward has to tell us.
And why shouldn't we? Each day brings new lies and corruption. Each day brings more confounding chatter. Why wouldn't we, for example, believe that the "President" was close to declaring war with North Korea in a tweet?
And so the plot, as they so often do, thickens. Like a really old bowl of clam chowder.