It's a Grand Old Party

And now, a partial list of those who will not be seeking the Republican Party's nomination to run for President of the United States:
New Jersey Governor Chris Christie
Former Alaska Governor and reality TV star Sarah Palin
Governor of Indiana Mitch Daniels
Former Governor of Florida Jeb "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother" Bush
Governor of Mississippi Haley Barbour
Former Governor of Arkansas Mike Huckabee
Governor of Louisiana Bobby "Bobby" Jindal
Former Governor of New York George "Tacky" Pataki
Congressman, not Governor, from Michigan Thaddeus McCotter
Real Estate Mogul, Reality TV Show Star, and fussy-pizza-eater Donald Trump
Senator from South Dakota John "Tommy" Thune
Congressman from Indiana Mike Pence
Mayor of New York City Michael "No Really, I'm A Republican" Bloomberg
Senator from South Carolina Jim "De Sugar-Free" DeMint
Former President of the United States Richard Nixon
Former President of the United States and Former Democrat Ronald Reagan
Former President of the United States Abraham Lincoln
Former Sith Lord Darth Vader
Former lead singer of Creed Scott Stapp
Please mark your ballots accordingly.