Tony Hayward
821 Cushie St.
Sevenoaks, Kent
(401) 555 - 0293
Objective
A challenging and rewarding position as a Highly Paid Executive.
Summary of Achievements
• member of the Citibank advisory board, from 2000 to 2003,coordinated accounts for several multi-national corporations
• senior independent non-executive director of Corus Group
• Dinner/Dance Captain, Lloyd's Yacht Club
• Strong background in sales, marketing, lying, cheating and stealing
Experience
Creating value for shareholders
Taking care of the world
Managed deposits of over oil across the globe, many of which can be found deep underwater, and some very near the surface
Ecological Criminal
Cribbage Champion, Lloyd's Yacht Club
Controlled fourth largest company on the planet, appeared before U.S. Congress, said as little as possible, destroyed several ecosystems, ran up a bill of 2.6 billion dollars to clean up the mess we made, Consistently snappy dresser
Education
Geology degree, Aston University, Birmingham
PhD, Corporate Brown-Nosing, University of Edinburgh
Golf Management, University of Birmingham/Florida Gulf Coast University
"I just want my life back."
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