Thursday, August 06, 2009

A New Hope

"When we walked through the doors, we saw standing before us President Bill Clinton," Laura Ling said to the applause of those who greeted her at the Burbank Airport. "We were shocked but we knew instantly in our hearts that the nightmare of our lives was finally coming to an end, and now we stand here, home and free."
I want to believe that when Barack Obama asked Hillary Clinton to be his Secretary of State that he knew he'd be getting a "package deal." For those of us who were Bill fans, this was a nice piece of happy news. It would be short-sighted to suggest that he brought about the release of journalists Euna Lee and Laura Ling all by himself, but its hard not to imagine that scenario. I picture Bill striding into the conference room, meeting Kim Jong Il's gaze with quiet assurance. "These two American reporters were not the spies you are looking for," he says with a small wave of his hand.
Kim's eyes glaze over slightly as he repeats, "These two American reporters are not the spies I am looking for."
"You will pardon them and release them immediately."
"I will pardon them and release them immediately."
Such is the way of the Jedi. I am sure that the Conservative Sith Lords snapped the necks of more than a few gray-tuniced subordinates as they watched Obi-Bill step off the plane and was greeted by his young padawan, Anakin Gore. And somewhere Princess Hillary was no doubt feeling the pull of the Dark Side. Barack Obama, in this particular scenario, would be Han Solo.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I couldn't help but think, if it had GW Bush instead of Clinton, GW probably would have ended up in the Gulag with those gals too.