Speak Directly Into The Lamp, Please

"Can you hear me now?"
Remember when the Verizon guy wasn't just a smirking, lurking presence? He was wandering around this great country of ours making certain that we could receive cellular telephone calls at any point in these United States. From California to the New York Island. Well, as it turns out, that guy might have been working for the Bush administration.
According to a new government report that questions the legal basis for the unprecedented anti-terrorism program, the Pinhead administration authorized secret surveillance activities that still have not been made public. It describes the entire program as the "President's Surveillance Program. "The report describes the program as unprecedented and raises questions about the legal grounding used for its creation. Badges? We don't need no stinking badges!
The incredible irony of this program is that an administration that was roundly criticized for being out of touch was busily listening in on any and all communications that might have been considered "dangerous." The report generated by five inspectors general said an unnamed White House official inserted a paragraph into the first threat assessment prepared by the CIA after the September 11 attacks, which was used to justify the extraordinary intelligence measures. The paragraph stated that the "individuals and organizations involved in global terrorism possessed the capability and intention to undertake further terrorist attacks within the United States," according to the report. It also said that the president should authorize the NSA to conduct the surveillance activities. And that's just what he did.
And now, to add an extra dollop of ironic frosting on the top, five former Pinhead administration officials refused to be interviewed for this report: including former CIA Director George Tenet and former Attorney General John Ashcroft. Yes, that's right, the ones who were so very interested in hearing what we had to say when we didn't want them to now don't want to talk about it. I guess timing is everything. And if you're still out there, listening: I've got a special non-verbal message just for you.