You've Got To Play To Win

I'll bet you I can tell you the score of this year's Super Bowl before it starts: I don't care. Get it? Okay, maybe that's not exactly how it's supposed to go, but it's all a part of what has become the most vicarious of all possible sporting events. I have friends who would like me to commit to one team or the other, but I remain firm in my convictions that I just want to see a really good game. Currently there is no line to bet on "a really good game" versus one that merely separates the commercials.
When I was a kid, my neighbor down the street saw every event and occurrence as an opportunity to wager. "I'll bet you I can make that shot left-handed." He had, of course, spent the previous six hours perfecting his left-hand technique. "I'll bet you we're gonna have pizza this week." Some of us had yet to realize that the school lunch menu was an item that could be read and memorized up to a week in advance. Who knew?
I lost a lot of milk money to that guy, until I realized that he only bet on things that he could control. The most impressive example of this trait was the casino he built in his parent's garage. Using episodes of "McHale's Navy" as his inspiration, he called it, "Little Vegas." It featured Roulette, Blackjack, and Craps. He had painstakingly rigged all of these games for the house to win. No matter that the odds for all of them are already tipped heavily in that direction, he wanted to be sure. By this time, I had learned my lesson from too many hard looks from my parents. But that didn't keep him from rounding up the other kids in the neighborhood to fleece them. Maybe I should have warned them, but that's why they call it "gambling."
So when you feel compelled to put your money down on a square, or bet the spread or who wins the coin toss, just remember all those ten-year-olds who learned that it's impossible to make eight the hard way with loaded dice. Me? I'm just hoping for a good game. And I've got twenty bucks that says Bruce is going to play "Badlands." And you can take that to the bank.