Friday, April 21, 2006

We All Scream For Ice Cream!

Hey true believers (I always liked that when Stan Lee called me that) - it's time to check our reality meters as April showers bring the promise of May flowers. It seems that Ben and Jerry's, unit of Anglo-Dutch consumer goods giant Unilever Plc, prides itself on its commitment to friendly business, and would therefore never do something as crude as naming a new flavor of ice cream after a notoriously violent British militia that operated during Ireland's war of independence.
Or perhaps they wouldn't if they had stopped long enough to consider their cleverness more carefully. The friendly folks over at Ben and Jerry's (and they really are friendly, just ask them) insist their new taste sensation is based on an ale and stout drink of the same name. "Any reference on our part to the British Army unit was absolutely unintentional and no ill-will was ever intended," said a Ben & Jerry's spokesman. "Ben & Jerry's was built on the philosophies of peace and love," he added.
Who were these British soldiers? The Black and Tans, so-called because of their two-tone uniforms, were recruited in the early 1920s to bolster the ranks of the police force in Ireland as anti-British sentiment grew. If it was intended as any sort of recognition of Irishness, the boys from Vermont missed - wide right.
But while we're at it, why stop there? I have a deep and abiding resentment for so-called "jam bands," and I believe that I would rather choke on my own vomit than eat a dessert called "Phish Food," and I'm still getting over September 11, so don't try to fudge coat any "New York Super Fudge Chunk" on me - okay? And doesn't "Cherry Garcia" glamorize substance use and wasn't Jerry diabetic anyway - God that's sick. But most of all I have a deep and crystalized resentment for "Chubby Hubby" - need I say any more?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Then again, maybe it is only named after Watney's and Guiness...

Kristen Caven said...

Yes, but it tastes sooooo goooood...