Sports Rant

I just spent the last few years building up a dislike for Jerry Rice. Sure, I know, Greatest Of All Time, holder of more records than I can begin to list here, and an Oakland Raider. This did not fit with my world view. The Raiders are the Evil Empire. I was raised at the foot of the Rocky Mountains, and all things silver and black are to be reviled and detested on general principal. Jerry had gone over to the Dark Side. He was using his Jedi skills to aid the enemy. Bad, bad Jerry.
Now Jerry's wearing orange and blue, and I have to modulate my thinking: Has he seen the light and wants to walk in the sun one last season before being laid to rest in some bizarre NFL version of a Viking funeral (not the Minnesota kind)? He's 42 years old - I'm 42 years old. Isn't anyone worried about him endangering himself out there? What if his bones turn to powder right in the middle of a deep slant? He's old, right?
"Stay down, Rock!" snarled Mickey at Sylvester Stallone as he pulled himself off the canvas one more time. Rocky wanted to go the distance - but Jerry? He is the distance. Jerry Rice is the standard by which all other wide receivers are measured, and yet he has this wild notion about going out and stretching the limit just a little bit more.
Now Brett Favre thinks he might like to hang around a year or two more - see what he started? At least he's got the taste and decorum to stick with one team. I hate to think about brittle old Joe Montana hopping up from his sideline rocking chair to go out and lead the Kansas City Chiefs to one more win. Kansas City? Who was he kidding? He did, in retrospect, provide me with one additional heartbreak by providing a last-second comeback for the Chiefs on a Monday night right after John Elway had given the Broncos a last-minute lead. That night there was only one man who could have done it better than John, and he just happened to be playing in the AFC West, damn it all.
So maybe it's payback - Jerry Rice will lead the Broncos to the Super Bowl and he'll go out on top. That's what they do with race horses - let them retire while they still have some spring in them. Then put 'em out to stud.