Through Mirrored Glasses Lightly

 Why would anyone think that what we really need to straighten out the border crisis is a South African billionaire who wastes more money than he makes? 

And yet, there was Elongated Mush, walking around with his "Smart Phone" at arm's length in Eagles Pass, Texas wearing a black cowboy hat and mirrored sunglasses with a couple days worth of stubble on his chin. Citizen Mush was there to give us all "an unfiltered look" at what was happening on the Texas-Mexico border. "What you see is what I see." 

As he wandered about, comments appeared under his feed, including such revelations as "Good to see Elon having to do the job of the MSM and of the politicians who are literally paid to do this but refuse." Mister Mush claimed to be pro-immigrant, since he is one, but also worried that the system should only allow hardworking and honest people to legally come to the U.S., but not allow immigrants who are going to break the law. It should be noted here that the CEO of Tesla and owner of a social media playground called (checks notes) Twitter broke federal labor laws by tweeting that employees would lose stock options if they joined a union. He also frequently breaks state and local laws by texting while driving. 

But we're pretty sure that these aren't the kind of laws about which Mister Mush is concerned. These are laws broken out of entitlement, not desperation. His concern about the plight of immigrants being bussed into New York from Texas, overwhelming the services there is admirable. I suppose. I suppose someone who can afford to buy a social media company in order to turn it into his own personal Faux News outlet could probably also afford to toss a percent of that amount at those overwhelmed services. This might allow for some of those immigrants to find a path to their own place in America. A nation of immigrants. 

After a few minutes, the live feed failed, leaving viewers to stare at the frozen image of the would-be cowboy. This was the unfiltered view of the border. When the connection was restored, there was thirteen more minutes of wandering about and suggesting that someone should build a wall down there before ending abruptly. 

Problem solved. The postscript was written later by Mister Mush, who felt the need to respond to his detractors regarding his fashion choices. "Just for the record, my boots are 20 years old and my hat is ten years old. And I have an arsenal of weapons, most of which I bought in California before they changed the law to make it impossible to do so. I’ve hip-fired a 50 cal while walking. Might have the video somewhere."

Because, in the end, it's really about the macho, right?