Thursday, December 29, 2005

Information Retrieval

Three years after its creation, an audit of the Department of Homeland Security finds that it is "poorly managed." I'm not sure an audit was completely necessary to discover this, considering the relative cost of the audit versus the obvious amount of evidence available for free. My guess is that the folks down in the Gulf Coast would be more than happy to deliver their opinions, without charge, on the job performance of Secretary Michael Chertoff.
"When one considers that FEMA's programs are largely administered through grants and contracts, the circumstances created by Hurricanes Katrina and Rita provides an unprecedented opportunity for fraud, waste, and abuse," the report said. You remember FEMA - run until recently by Michael "Brownie" Brown? The guy who was praise by his boss, George W. "Pinhead" Bush, for doing "a heckuva job?" Michael Brown is still pulling down a six figure salary from that agency - I suppose we can look at it as money paid to keep us safe from Michael "Brownie" Brown.
All of this comes hard on the heels of the newly redefined TSA (Transportation Safety Administration or Twits Standing Around) restrictions have allowed us all to regain the freedom of our nail clippers and pocket knives, while we still have to worry about erratic behavior of the sort that got Rigoberto Alpizar shot in Orlando for not carrying a bomb on board an airplane. Suffering from bipolar disorder, apparently Mr. Alpizar was shot for missing his meds.
Enjoy the holiday travel rush, and pray that the levees hold until the reorganization of the reorganization is complete at the Department of Homeland Security. Mazeltov!

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