Lost Boys

 There was a time when Christmas centered on the happiness of children. Not just the one who was then living under our roof, but the crew of kids with whom he grew up. This was a herd of boys that all attended the same preschool at roughly the same time. Ours was the only child among the group, so he was gifted with a room full of brothers. We joined forces with the parents of this band of boys and began a series of playdates that escalated into family gatherings that culminated in a yearly trip to what snow could be found in the mountains above Tahoe. 

It's been quite some time since we made that annual trek. Boys have a way of growing up. Priorities shift and nests have a way of emptying. What was once a close circle of friends became a group of names on a Christmas card list. These boys are young men now with lives of their own. They no longer need the orchestrated push from moms and dads to connect. Our son stays in touch with those with those he was closest through social media. It's hard to imagine what ubiquitous cell phone use might have looked like when we were trying to hold all those little minds' attention back in the day. There was a time when screen time was a thing that all those parents believed they could control. 

The good news is that these were all good boys. Herding them from one activity to another was made easier by the skills we all learned together at their co-op preschool. We were all teachers back then, and we were gifted with a number of prized students. Sure, there were tears and hurt feelings, but the underlying message of all of this was that they were all friends. We never mentioned that this was coincidental and convenient for the grownups. It was simply how we moved through those pre-teen years. 

Eventually, of course, all these boys grew up and out of the structures created by their parents. The found their own friends and with the advent of drivers licenses, they all became able to pick and choose their own tribes. Some of them hung around longer than others. Whenever we run into members of that group in the grocery store or coming out of a movie theater, we chat briefly about the times we used to have. 

Then we're off to discover our own path, grateful that we had that starting place. We were gifted with a group of peers for launching that new generation. The one we lovingly referred to as The Spicy Tacos.