Not That Funny Currently

Hey kids, we are beginning our descent into 2018, and the thing that probably bothers me the most about the year we are leaving behind is this: Nazis. How could it be that more than forty years after we had put a stake through the heart of this movement that we are currently hip deep in them again? We have spent the last few decades dealing with Nazis as pop culture punch lines: The Soup Nazi on Seinfeld, for example. How funny it would be to find these oppressive characters wandering around in real life. So much so that my family adopted a friend's tradition of The Birthday Fascist.
Whoever was lucky enough to be celebrating their birthday was given this honorary title, and they were allowed to make demands of all those around. All those participating swore undying allegiance to the Birthday Fascist, and if that meant a twilight game of miniature golf, that was what happened. If that meant eating the cake first and saving the frosting until last, that was how it was going to be.
Of course, the Birthday Fascist was generally a pretty benevolent soul and did not make a practice of calling for race cleansing or the elimination of those he or she found impure. Nobody got hurt.
That has not been the case in 2017. Just last week, a Virginia couple was murdered by a teenaged Neo-Nazi who was angry with them for reporting him and breaking things off with their daughter. This is not a very special episode of Family Ties, where Alex Keaton explores the darker side of Republican politics. These are real people, Americans, exploring all the ways that Hitler really seemed to have a handle on things.
In 2017.
The suggestion that there is an "antifa movment" in our country seems patently absurd. Do you know who was "antifa?" Franklin Roosevelt. Harry Truman. Oh. That's right. They're Democrats. What else would we expect? Well then, how about Dwight David Eisenhower? The man who brought Richard Nixon to the national stage. Republican President Dwight Eisenhower led the Allied Forces in Europe against Hitler and Mussolini and all their fascist rank and file. It was part of the reason that he was elected: He was a war hero in the war to rid the planet of fascists.
And now they are back. At a time when I can walk into my living room and ask my television to turn itself on, I have to worry about "the Master Race?" It should be over. We fought that war and we won. 2018 awaits. Let's make it Nazi-free, shall we?