Endorsements

Writing a blog every day doesn't give me much of a leg to stand on when it comes to my aversion to social media. Here I am, after all, being social with my media. And yet I continue to rail against Facebook and Instagram and all those other outlets for whatever happens to be on the minds of those who choose those outlets for whatever it is that happens to be on the minds of those. Which is also why the revelation of my involvement with LinkedIn should be cause for those of you who are prone to such actions to climb to the highest height and shout "hypocrite!" Or you could just pull out your smart phone and tweet it.
All of this is to say that I am seemingly powerless to avoid the somewhat narcissistic tendency of our current culture. What I have to say is important and I need as many outlets as I can manage to share it. Okay, I may be overstating this for dramatic effect, but that's what gets clicked upon, right? I ask this rhetorical question in the sly anticipation that it will cause some sort of response from anyone or everyone who reads it, which I suppose limits its rhetoricality.
LinkedIn: that's why I'm writing this. A confession of sorts. I got involved a few years back because it seemed like a great way to stay connected to those who shared common goals and interests, and I could eventually parlay all this connection into career advancement. I wanted to believe that I was being a clever professional who could network with other clever professional types in order to further my plans for world domination. Oops. I probably shouldn't have stated my goals so plainly for all to see. Or maybe I really don't know how joining LinkedIn helped me get a better job that would allow me to eventually dominate the world. Or my corner of it. Sure, sometimes I would get nice messages from people with whom I had worked at other times in other places. I was on Facebook without all that Facebook stigma. This was professional, after all. And every so often I would get job listings in places like Iowa and Massachusetts, encouraging me to spread my wings and take a chance on moving my family and my base of operations to some foreign land where there were opportunities for people just like me. I have clicked on a few of these, and I have been flattered just to think that someone might consider me worthy of such a leap. I am flattered in the same way I am flattered by the "endorsements" from other LinkedIn users of my various skills and abilities. I have yet to be endorsed for writing pithy blogs, but that may just be an oversight on the part of those who find themselves drawn to my circle.
What i did get from LinkedIn was an e-mail. It came with the header, "This company hires the most creative writing majors." Curious, I clicked through. I wanted to know what I had been missing out on for all these years. I thought creative writing majors were school teachers. You mean there is another avenue? Tell me, LinkedIn, what is it? According to them, the third place employer of creative writing majors is New York University, which didn't seem like that big a leap for me. The second went to Examiner.com, which made me wonder if I was missing an opportunity to share my writing with a wider audience in some dot com way. Anxious for the big reveal, I placed my mouse arrow over the box that encouraged me to "see the top employer." I clicked. Since you don't know what I saw, I will tell you: The number one employer of creative writing majors, according to LinkedIn, is Starbucks. Thanks for that endorsement, LinkedIn.