The Truth Is Out There - Way Out There

For many years, it was unclear whether or not Abe Vigoda was alive. Thanks to technology, we have the ability monitor Abe's status on a regular basis. I confess that if someone had asked me if Lyndon Larouche was dead, I might have guessed that he had passed on as well. It wasn't Al Gore's Internet that clued me into my faux pas, but the carefully placed flyer I found next to my mailbox this morning. Perhaps "flyer" is the wrong term, since it weighs in at a hefty forty pages, and contains lots of dense print and helpful pictures and graphs. Wedged inside this magazine was another publication, only twenty-four pages, calling itself "An Interim LPAC Report: The U.S.A. 2008 Election."
Both of these periodicals were left by faceless strangers in hopes that I might consider the "$5 suggested contribution" printed on the covers. By my reckoning, I'm ten bucks ahead on this deal. Lyndon would like us to know that, not only is he still alive and kicking, but he is a force on the web as well, where one can feel free to contribute online. And just what are we contributing to? "...the leadership of the Democratic Party and the Republican Party: neither is morally fit to survive! They're as unmorally fit to survive as the people who backed Mussolini and backed Hitler back in the 1920s and the 1930s."
Now don't you just want to keep reading to find out what else is on Lyndon's mind? He blames Harry Truman for the British Empire's recolonization of the world. Not the British, really, but the Anglo-Dutch Liberal financier empire. He also maintains that Richard Nixon was "a stooge for London." The more I read, the more fascinating it became. It also gave me the creeps. It reminded me of the black helicopter conspiracies of twenty years ago. There is a crazy, serpentine logic to it all, but you feel creepy reading it just the same.
I got to the part where he compares Barack Obama to Elmer Gantry, and had to stop. I may eventually go back and finish wading through this thing, because I would like to know what's going on out there, even the creepy parts. And speaking of creepy, I don't have any way to know how all this literature came to me. In my mind, I see a lonely old man shambling down the street in the wee hours of the morning, with his satchel of brochures and pamphlets, jamming them in doorways and mail slots. Is it Abe Vigoda or Lyndon Larouche?