Elvis, Jim Morrison, Osama bin Laden

On their web site, CNN is reporting that Osama bin Laden turned fifty this Saturday "if he's alive." His most recent public appearance was back in 2004, and that was on videotape. There have been subsequent audio tapes, but those have not been authenticated for date and time. In spite of a twenty-five million dollar reward for information leading to the death or arrest (dead or alive, right Pinhead?) of Public Enemy number one.
After five years of scouring the mountains, caves and deserts of Afghanistan, twelve thousand U.S. troops have discovered exactly bupkiss. How is his possible? A country with an area slightly smaller than Texas is providing safe haven for the world's most wanted man. It can't be that our soldiers aren't doing everything they can to bring Osama to justice, but when you start to consider some of the math, it becomes a little more apparent: Pinhead has requested an additional ten thousand troops be sent to Iraq (with an area twice the size of Idaho) to bring the total to somewhere in the neighborhood of one hundred and fifty thousand. Exact numbers aren't really necessary, but powers of ten are. As we struggle to determine a possible extrication strategy from Iraq, we have a tenth of that force in Afghanistan, alternately battling Taliban and al-Qaida while turning over rocks to find the evil mastermind of September 11.
I see this as a tremendous opportunity missed. One hundred thousand men, equipped with night vision goggles and heat seeking weapons could easily have tracked down one man with fifty candles on his birthday cake. Alas.