Why I Hate Freedom

Question: How many Bush administration officials does it take to change a light bulb?

Answer: None. There is nothing wrong with the light bulb; its conditions are improving every day. Any reports of its lack of incandescence are a delusional spin from the liberal media. There is no shortage of filament. That light bulb has served honorably, and anything you say undermines the lighting effect. Why do you hate freedom?

And so it goes. That's the joke, right? Well Donald "Mister Yuks" Rumsfeld said Thursday that anyone demanding deadlines for progress in Iraq should "just back off," because it is too difficult to predict when Iraqis will resume control of their country. I confess that when I hear Jon Stewart doing his impersonation of President Pinhead, I almost always picture Yosemite Sam as our Chief Executive. Now when I think of Rummy, I'll be thinking of Yosemite Sam again, but as a pair of those slightly ubiquitous mud flaps from the late seventies.
Up the road a piece, President Pinhead expressed "disappointment" with the progress in the war. Disappointment. I'm disappointed when the books I order from Amazon.com don't come before the weekend. I'm disappointed when I have to buy a whole album on iTunes to get the one song I really want. I'm disappointed when I have to settle for cauliflower when I really had my heart set on broccoli. Ninety-six Americans dead in combat so far this month. Disappointed? Time to break out the thesaurus, Pinhead.