A while back I wrote here about using a hair dryer to stave off being contaminated by COVID-19. If you still have a blow dryer up your nose, put it down. Unless of course this has been a part of your grooming regimen for some time. Unruly nose hair can be a trial even when we aren't in the midst of a global pandemic.
What I would like to suggest is this: One hundred monkeys and one hundred typewriters. Not actually, but in the following hypothesis: We have millions of people, some of them quite clever - educated even, and it seems that if we were to unleash this vast potential problem solving mechanism on finding a cure for the disease that is currently having its way with the planet. Two housecats were recently diagnosed with coronavirus. And Idris Elba. That was in case you weren't already stirred by the hundreds of thousands who are suffering and dying. Idris Elba.
Instead of spending all your time trying to figure out how to get wifi in the guest bathroom, or choosing what to binge on Netflix next, put on your thinking cap and set yourself a goal to come up with a cure or at least a treatment for COVID-19.
Since you asked, I have considered a few. Like the thought of giving coronavirus the coronavirus. See how they like it. Or what about the M Knight Shamalamadingdong movie where it turns out that water is what kills the aliens? In War of the Worlds it was the common cold that brought the Martians down, so maybe if we can't infect the virus with itself, maybe we could give it some of Keith Richards' old blood from back when he used to have really scary blood. Before he had it all replaced. Or we could lure it to a Taco Bell and force it to eat the entire Dollar Menu. Someone recently suggested that we could scare it away by telling it that we really have feelings for it. And we think it might be time for a commitment.
Instead of singing Happy Birthday or It's A Small World or any other tune that goes on between twenty seconds and four hours, why not spend some time ruminating on how we might combat this beast of a germ? Consider its motivations. Ponder its potential as a world leader, compared to some already elected to high office. Imagine how we might ruin its day instead of staying hidden in our caves, only stepping out in our masks when we want a breath of fresh air filtered through a bandanna.
Or maybe this is all a bad dream, and we will all wake up soon with a sigh of relief. Because that's another thing that I have learned from watching Invaders From Mars. Except when we think we can wipe the sweat from our collective brow and move on with our lives, it turns out that was no dream. There's a worldwide pandemic going on right outside and there is no cure.
So let's get busy.