Wednesday, October 22, 2008

As Real As It Gets

I'm not guessing that I could put it any better than Jon Stewart, who devoted most of his October 20th show to the inflammatory ramblings of Republicans about "the real America." The general consensus of these rabid talking heads has been that the portions of the country that aren't falling into the Republican line are not part of that special place. Those of us not fortunate enough to find ourselves living in that "real America" will most certainly feel the wrath of "real Americans" soon.
Just as soon as we finish bailing out the financial institutions that aren't exactly based in those bucolic small towns that Sarah Palin has been rhapsodizing about in the past few weeks: "We believe that the best of America is in these small towns that we get to visit, and in these wonderful little pockets of what I call the real America, being here with all of you hard working very patriotic, um, very, um, pro-America areas of this great nation. This is where we find the kindness and the goodness and the courage of everyday Americans. Those who are running our factories and teaching our kids and growing our food and are fighting our wars for us. Those who are protecting us in uniform. Those who are protecting the virtues of freedom."
I felt a brief surge of patriotism as I found myself, a teacher of kids, in her soliloquy, but then I realized that just being a part of a state that would even debate the issue of gay marriage pretty much puts me in league with Stalin or Satan or both. I don't live in one of those pro-America pockets. I live in one of those big socialist cesspools, one of those big cities. I don't have a flag pin in my lapel.
You can be sure that the reason that Sarah Palin charged Alaska's taxpayers for her children's commercial airline tickets was not just because they represent the state wherever they go with her, but also for the vital need they must have to reconnect with that "real America" energy. More than twenty-one thousand dollars worth of flights from Juneau to Anchorage seems like a small price to pay to get that "big city stink" off those poor girls. No doubt there are a few isolated spots of liberal thought spoiling the otherwise Unspoiled American Wilderness of Alaska. Sarah is just doing what any good mother would do. If that mother happened to be governor of a state and had access to twenty-thousand dollars.
Hey Sarah: Get Real.

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