Measure For Measure

 Football season is upon us. 

I know this because there was a news item about how the National Football League used their first preseason game to test out their "virtual first down system." For those of you who don't follow the game of American Football or are simply waiting for the games to count, you may have missed this event. 

After more than a century of using two sticks and a chain between them to determine just how far ten yards is, science has provided a way to do that same thing with some very fancy and expensive new cameras. You may have been thinking that the 4K TV you have in your living room is a pretty amazing piece of technology, but Sony has 8K which gives twice as many Ks as your TV. This allows the game to be monitored from above by machines that can pinpoint the placement of the ball on the field and allow the game to progress without those lengthy time-outs for measurement. Since games can be won or lost based on a few inches here or there, this comes as a boon to those of us who have held our breath while that chain has been stretched and then that far stick is somewhat ceremoniously put down to show once again just how far ten yards is. 

No kinks in the chain. No "friendly measurement." No excuses to nip out to the kitchen for more chips while the best union in the world continues to hold sway in the twenty-first century. 

For decades now, people like me have wondered why there wasn't a chip placed in the ball with sensors on the field that could detect whether or not the line to gain had been reached. Still more adults across the globe have wondered why this matters so much. Meanwhile, those three guys with their orange vest and sticks have had job security more than anyone else in the league. These folks are getting paid the princely sum of seventy-five to one hundred fifty dollars per game. This feels like a pittance compared to the responsibility these stalwart keepers of the yards carry on their shoulders. My guess is that the Hawk-Eye camera system will be quite a bit more expensive to operate and maintain. 

And starts to meander in the direction of Artificial Intelligence. "Hey Google, was that a first down?"

"I'm sorry Dave. I don't think I can help you with that right now. Why don't you take a stress pill?"

Speaking of stress, you don't have to feel bad about those poles and vests and so forth. They will continue to show up for this season anyway. They'll be there to remind us just how important ten yards really is.