Little Rascals

 On behalf of all men, I feel compelled to apologize for Matt Gaetz. The "representative" from Florida used his seven minutes at the Student Action Summit in his home state to blather on about the people who protest for reproductive rights are not in danger of becoming pregnant because of their looks. Not all of us are blessed with the coverboy looks of Matt Gaetz. Happily. And he seems to have missed the logical fallacy in his argument: Looks have nothing to do with the female reproductive system. Just like his chiseled features and high forehead does not translate into any sort of extra virility. Again, I am sorry for any confusion or hurt that this tiny mind may have sprayed, or will probably continue to spray as a result of his affiliation with the He-Man Woman Haters Club. 

For those of you unfamiliar, the origins of the He-Man Woman Haters Club go back to 1937. It was a simpler time, but just as confounding for many. Alfalfa was hoping to connect with Darla, a strong woman of her time, but his looming appointment as president of the HMWHC conflicted mightily with such an interaction. His pal Spanky, for one, was almost certain to look down on him for dismissing his oath and thereby bringing down the entire organization. It is only after Spanky and his sergeant at arms are lured to Darla's house to find out what Alfalfa has been up to that they are ensnared by the feminine wiles of Darla, and the President of the He-Man Woman Haters Club. In drag. In the end, it turns out that being able to share cookies and ice cream with whomever one chooses is the best course of action.

Reproductive rights didn't come up in the course of this Our Gang short, but I can't help but see the template for today's Republican Party on display here. The need for wild-eyed caricaturing to achieve points that are far too subtle for tiny minds to comprehend. I would not limit this kind of grotesque speech to carnivals held in Florida, but it sure does have a way of being echoed down there. The former game show host and twice impeached "president" used the occasion of his ex-wife Ivana's death to do a little fundraising, for example. This thrice-married serial philanderer continues to stand as the figurehead of a herd of cartoonish nimrods looking to return to a time that never really existed in the first place. And for this, the leader of the January 6th insurrection believes he is due a Congressional Medal of Honor. If only he could have awarded it to himself. 

Spanky confronted Alfalfa: "What about your promise to the He-Man Woman Haters Club?"

"Spanky," Alfalfa responds, "I've got my own life to lead."

In a world full of Spanky, be and Alfalfa.