Thursday, August 08, 2019

This Word You Keep Using

Doris Day, God Rest Her Soul, once had a hit with a song titled, "Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps."
In it, she asks someone we can only assume is a suitor of hers, if he loves her. The suitor responds, "Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps." She says she has asked him a million times, but all he ever answers is, "Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps." As the song progresses, Doris becomes more and more put off by the non-committal nature of this response. "If you can't make your mind up - We'll never, get started," she laments.
Perhaps. It's one of those words designed to put people off. "Possibly, but not certainly," if you're looking for guidance from Webster. Or "maybe." Which is probably okay if you're being asked if you want to the Orange Julius stand in the mall. "Perhaps." But it does not work as well in affairs of the heart, as Ms. Day so kindly points out. 
It is also a ridiculous response when it comes to gun violence. After a week that saw dozens of Americans shot and killed while going about their daily business, our "President" said "We've done actually a lot, but perhaps more has to be done." 
Many of us were left scratching our collective heads when it came to the "a lot" that has been done by this administration to stop mass killings. Universal background checks? Nope. Assault weapons ban? Nope. Closing gun show and Internet sale loopholes? Nope. Thoughts and prayers? By the tweetful. Should something be done now?
Will there be chocolate cake at the party?
Can you help me with my algebra?
Could you please pass some sort of meaningful gun control legislation?
See? It just doesn't work there. 
Not when you're slathering at the feet of the NRA, promising them that no one not ever will take their guns away. Not when you're using the Second Amendment as a shield to deflect, well, not bullets. Bad thoughts? Indecision? Fear of growing a spine?

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