It wasn't too awfully long ago that I briefly lost my heart, and some might say my mind, to a Republican. He was a senator from Arizona, and his straight talk and his experience made him seem like a common-sense alternative to the man who would go on to win his party's nomination and secure the presidency for eight very long years. By 2008, however, whatever back room soul-stealing deals had been made for John McCain and his usefulness in my world had made him all but recognizable. Perhaps it is a little unfair, but I still hold Senator McCain personally responsible for unleashing Sarah Palin on the wider world. How much safer we all would have been and continue to be if she would have just quit her job up in Alaska and gone straight to reality TV? Come to think of it, that seems to be the current path to the Republican nomination, so she may have been a pioneer in that respect. Did I just put the word "respect" in a sentence referring to Sarah Palin? So sorry.
Then what to my wondering eyes should appear, but another straight-shootin' young man from the Grand Canyon State: Senator Jeff Flake. His current claim to fame is that he is one of his party's congressional holdouts when it comes to endorsing the presumptive Trumptive. In interviews, Senator Flake has suggested that John McCain might be re-elected come November, but that Trumpest could lose that mostly red state. "If Donald Trump is at
the top of the ticket, here in Arizona, with over thirty percent of the vote being the
Hispanic vote, no doubt that this may be the race of my life. If you listen or
watch Hispanic media in the state and in the country, you will see that it is all
anti-Trump. The Hispanic community is roused and angry in a way that I've never
seen in thirty years."
And what do you suppose his Trumpishness did when he went to Capitol Hill this week? He had a closed-door meeting with GOP members who weren't exactly seeing eye-to-squinty-eye with him. The former reality TV personality called Senator Flake out, suggesting that he expected that Flake would lose in November. Except his seat isn't up for grabs until 2018. Who can keep all these facts and numbers in their head? Flake also took the time to defend his fellow Arizonan from the tacky flack that Trumpde has lobbed in McCain's direction over the past few months: “Yes, I’m the other senator from Arizona — the
one who didn’t get captured — and I want to talk to you about statements like
that,” was his reply to The Orange One's assertion that he had been critical of his tone deaf politics. The kind of guy who suggests that you can't be a war hero if you get captured, and praises Saddam Hussein.
Again, dear reader, I must apologize. As things continue to get curiouser and curiouser, I find my attentions and affections pulled in some strange directions. For now, I tip my metaphorical fedora to Senator Flake, and hope that he never runs for president. And stays away from Alaska.