Wednesday, September 04, 2024

Lying Around

 I believe that once the former game show host and adjudicated rapist started complaining that Kamala Harris never worked at McDonald's we may finally have reached a level of desperation only felt in those who fell into those apocryphal quicksand pits in movie serials. 

Specifically: Outside of someone like me who takes ongoing and questionable pleasure in discussing their time behind the counter of a fast food restaurant, there aren't that many people who choose to highlight that point of their resumes. It is not the kind of thing that one might choose to show off when attempting to get into college. Or when interviewing for a law firm. 

It's the kind of experience that is best saved for blog entries, and the occasional Democratic Party acceptance speech. Vice President Harris is, and I'm sorry if I sound like a killjoy for mentioning this, attempting to relate to the common folk as she does this. Which is pretty solidly the take we should all get from her choice of the Helpful Hardware Man as her running mate. To this point, I can only say that very little can shake my belief that Tim Walz has recently been on an extension ladder checking his gutters before autumn descends. 

And yet, investigations continue into the veracity of Kamala Harris having a job at McDonald's. Is the conceit behind this detective work that somehow a trend will become apparent, consistent with the notion that "if she'll lie about making fries, she'll lie about anything?"

Well, for just a moment let's say that Kamala Harris never worked at a McDonald's. She was lying. Much in the same way that Barack Obama was lying about being born in the United States. Certainly one should be disqualified for lying about anything when one considers running for President. Like having multiple affairs outside the bounds of marriage, including one with a porn actress while another in a series of  wives was pregnant with another in a series of your offspring. Or the story about how you almost died in a helicopter crash with Willie Brown, except it wasn't Willie Brown. Or how violent crime is making our streets unsafe for everyone, except that violent crime has actually been trending down. 

But this much we can be sure of: The ex-"president" and convicted felon never held a job at any fast food restaurant. He never made his own french fries. He is suspicious of giving those folks who make his Big Macs a living wage. 

Watch out for that quicksand!

1 comment:

Kristen Caven said...

I suppose it makes sense that the king of pants on fire would also see lies where there are none.