I looked it up. The definition of oligarch is "a very rich business leader with a great deal of political influence." Oh, and I left out the parenthetical that preceded it: (especially in Russia). Which is interesting, since it seemed like the definition was just fine without it. Instead, we are left to wonder if Jeff Bezos an oligarch? It certainly seems as though he fits the description. How about Elon Musk? It could be that somewhere in there, these men are both secretly Russian, though in the case of Elon the question isn't so much what country but what planet.
As the images from Ukraine keep tumbling in, stories of refugees streaming to the borders, maternity hospitals destroyed, and the casualties mounting by the hour, I couldn't help but wonder where the billionaires were. They are not walking across the borders. Ukrainian oligarchs are chartering jets and hopping on whatever private and expensive conveyance they can buy to get out of the country before things get even more horrible.
But what sort of horrible things happen to oligarchs? In the case of the previously mentioned Mister Bezos, whose fortune has nearly doubled over the two years of global pandemic. Mister Musk? His nest egg has grown from about twenty-seven billion in early January 2020 to more than one hundred seventy billion today. Dollars. Ironic perhaps that the biggest purveyor of electric vehicles should never have to worry about buying six dollar a gallon gas.
Speaking of six dollar a gallon gas, let's try and keep in mind that when the minimum wage employees of your neighborhood Shell station went out to put new plastic numbers on the sign out front advertising the new and historic price we would all get to pay for fossil fuel, the folks in the Netherlands were not scrambling around looking for change in the couch. The gas that was in the tanks below their filling stations was already refined and paid for, but just in case the slightest pinch might be felt anywhere along the way, it was important to pass along that pain to the customers. I know. The image of some big fat guy in a cowboy hat in Houston would be so much more palatable than a big fat guy in a Dutch bonnet reclining in The Hague. Right?
This is why we have money: To insulate us from the harsh realities of life. Like expensive gasoline. Or war. It doesn't really matter what country these oligarchs choose to moor their superyachts. They won't feel that aforementioned pinch until the very end.
Pinch an Oligarch Today!
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