Sunday, December 04, 2016

Winners And Losers

As the terribly flawed and illegal count of popular votes continues to expand in favor of the loser, the new world order continues to line up at the door of Trump Tower. Who do you suppose showed up for dinner at Jean Georges? None other than once and future presidential non-elect Mitt Romney. It is worth pointing out at this moment that Donald Trump and Mitt Romney have not always had a lot in common. Mitt lost the popular vote in his election too. That gave them some basis for discussion, as well as the groveling that one might expect in such an encounter.
"Donald!"
"Mitt."
"Nice tie."
"Thanks."
"It really sets off your, um, your uh..."
"Eyes?"
"Yes. That's exactly it. I wasn't going to say 'fake tan.'"
"Right. So let's get down to business."
The business of governance. Maybe the former governor of Massachusetts wants to be our new Secretary of State. He has something in common with our current Secretary of State, John Kerry. They both did their public service in the state of Massachusetts. And they both lost the popular vote in their bid for the presidency. If that was the only qualification, then he'd be in. But that's not always the way things work. My guess is there were several very uncomfortable moments while the two millionaires made small talk about family, friends, and those they may have casually oppressed. Then things got serious.
"How bad do you want this job?"
"Uh, what do you mean?"
"What would you be willing to do?"
"To do?"
"For me."
"For you?"
"Yes."
Then we can only imagine what may have taken place. Who knows how much further Mister Romney may have felt he needed to debase himself in order to get that position that he so desperately craves. Whatever foul ideas the host of TV's Celebrity Apprentice might have come up with, it would probably be more appropriate for a very special episode of Shark Tank. I wonder if Mitt could make that jump on water skis.

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