"We Belong Dead"

Though I have never watched an entire episode of "American Idol," I know enough about the landscape of popular culture to know that the departure of Simon Cowell is a devastating blow to the balance of power in Television Land. His high-intensity beam of snarkiness is the kind of personality quirk that comes around only a few times each generation. It's the kind of thing that starts great waves of replication: "Get me a Simon-type for the next..." And so on. Mister Cowell would be the first to acknowledge his own commodification.
Kudos to him for knowing that he doesn't want to, if he hasn't already, overstay his welcome. Even controlled doses of furrowed eyebrows, eye-rolling and pursed lips begin to stack up after a while. As I mentioned before, though I have never watched his show from start to finish, yet I feel very comfortable assessing his character. At least the one he feels compelled to show us on TV.
That is why he knows it is time to disappear for a while. It's what they used to do with the Frankenstein monster in the thirties. Each new director and screenwriter would find a way to do the big green guy in: fire, sulfur, explosion, and a few years later somebody else would literally have to dig him up and dust him off to do wrestle with a wolfman or Abbott and Costello. Sewn together as he was from parts of dead bodies, there wasn't much that would keep this guy down. Until the atomic bomb. After Hiroshima and Nagasaki, there was something a whole lot scarier than a shuffling giant with bolts in his neck. Lately they've been doing the same thing with Freddy Kreuger, Michael Myers and Jason Voorhees. My suspicion is that, in the wake of the terrorist attacks of 9/11, knife-wielding psychopaths don't hold the same fear factor they might have a decade ago.
And just like Frankie or Jason, Simon won't be gone too long. He'll bring himself back with his next big idea, "The X-Factor" before you know it. If that doesn't fly, he'll bring Abbott and Costello back to life and have them judge his next talent show. Now that's scary, kids.