We Could Be Heroes

It began with a careless remark about X-Men and Wolverine. A member of our staff was saying that she was excited about seeing "Australia" for the considerable talents of Hugh Jackman, "and not because of that whole X-Man thing." Fair enough, but the talk went directly there, and then on to all things super-heroic. We reckoned that the next few years would have a fairly liberal sprinkling of movies devoted to men and women in tights.
Then our resident comic book expert wondered aloud if we wouldn't soon see Ant-Man on the big screen. As it turns out, he needn't worry, because the story of Hank Pym is on the fast track to a theater near you, probably in 2010. That would be before Captain America. And right about the same time as Thor. And just about any other major player in the Marvel Universe. The story of a biochemist that can shrink down to the size of an ant while retaining his full human strength is odd, but not necessarily super. Hank is, after all, pretty much the Marvel equivalent of Aquaman.
It's an easy target, a little like shooting man-fish in a barrel. Aquaman's powers consist primarily in his ability to talk to fish. And he can swim very fast. That was enough to get him into the Justice League of America. He occupies that spot in the very pleasant pantheon of DC comics akin to Marvel's Namor, the Sub-Mariner. Except that Namor would probably eat Aquaman for lunch. With a little tartar sauce.
That's why the folks at HBO decided it would be fine to let their big star in "Entourage" appear, tongue in gill, as Aquaman. He's the Super Friend that nobody really wants to talk about. So what if two-thirds of the planet is covered by water? If I'm a super-villain, I'm not worried about my caper being foiled by vigilante dolphins. By the end of lunch, we had decided that if talking to fish is a super-power, then Doctor Dolittle should be a member of the Justice League as well. And he'd be a much snappier dresser.