Thursday, August 10, 2006

Stars In My Eyes

For the most part, I'm a pretty cynical character. I tend to look for the strings attached to most everything. I'm quick to point out to my associates that the nice Nigerian man who needs help arranging his finances over the Internet might not be on the up and up. Wishes really do come true - with a whole lot of work and financing. Then there's this whole astrology thing.
Maybe it's because I've spent my life "on the cusp." I have lived on a line between Gemini and Cancer, and for the life of me, I can't figure out which one I'm supposed to be. Oh, I know the horoscope routine, and I will generally cop to the dates that they print in the paper. I know that "experts" in this science will tell me that being on the cusp is a profound state and therefore I should be endowed with all the spiritual gifts from both signs. But really - if this were true, in an empirical sense, wouldn't there be some sort of way to pro-rate those qualities given the number of hours into the last day of Gemini and the number of minutes into Cancer - and daylight savings time, and wind velocity, and was the sparrow African or European?
I've never read a horoscope that seemed to apply to me. Many times during my life I've had people "read my chart" (at their insistence) and then tell me just how profound the connections are between me and everyone else on the planet who had the fortune to be born on June twenty-first.
Then I found Harvey Sid Fisher. Harvey may at first seem like a talentless hack with an annoying nasal voice, but he just may be the link to Astrological phenomena I've been looking for. Consider this: Two of my closest friends on the planet were born on the same day. Okay, probably not getting shivers just yet, but then I read the lyrics to Harvey's song about Leos:
I'M A LOVIN LEO LION
DON'T PUT ME IN NO ZOO
I'M A LOVIN LEO LION
I WON'T DO NO TRICKS FOR YOU
MY ROYALTY CAN SOMETIMES BE
A LITTLE TO RICH FOR MY BLOOD
I ALWAYS AIM SO HIGH
I WILL BE REACHING FOR THE SKY
AND I'LL GET STUCK IN THE MUD
NO WITTICISM IF THE JOKES ON ME
SHOW CRITICISM IF IT'S COMPLIMENTARY
MY VANITY LOVES FLATTERY
It's like he knew them all of his life. Harvey really opened my eyes to a wider world. Now if I could just figure out which song I should listen to...

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