Saturday, June 27, 2020

Casual Causality

Casual racism. No, not the kind you do on Fridays or while wearing khakis. We are talking about the sort of thing that happens far too often. This is usually the case when someone (white) lets fly with something that of course they "did not mean." These are the types of things that come just before an insistence that there was nothing racist intended and that the person who casually let their racist flag fly is not really a racist. How could they be? They have x number of black friends, where x equals a number from one to "lots."
Let me make sure we all get this, by the way: I work in a school with a predominately black population and there have been plenty of times where white guy (me) has felt uncomfortable haring or seeing how "my people" are viewed. I could take offense, and shout "reverse discrimination." I could feel hurt or frightened. Or I could realize that the system that has been in place for our country's history does not truly allow for this to have any traction at all. I accept the fact that I show up as white guy until I distinguish myself as a human being with any other traits that don't give rise to that cultural reality. Not a stereotype. White males own and run everything. They are the oppressors and the ones who made the system work for them for all these years. Little treats like Affirmative Action and the Civil Rights Act did not solve the problem.
This is how casual racism continues to exist. Carrying a Confederate flag and shouting racist epithets at the top of your lungs just makes you a cartoon. Very few, if any, humans of any stripe would allow these idiots to have more than their ten minutes of attention before switching over to something a little more subtle. And maybe a little more dangerous. The Karens of the world are generally horrified once they have seen or heard themselves. Karens of all genders. It's time to stop acting shocked and change the way we treat one another. Think before you speak is a little piece of advice I would like to pass along.
While we're on the topic of "casual," how about treating all women better? Casual sexism isn't casual sex, but it's probably a result of this sort of barely thinking. "She wanted it." "They all want it." Those are the sounds of a terribly insecure human being. What we want and with whom is not for anyone to assume. Providing any sort of gratification for anyone just to get through the world that white men made for their entertainment is no longer okay. "You should smile more." Maybe, but only if no one ever said those words again.
Once upon a time, I wrote An Apology For All Men. I did this as a response to being on the watching end of a world that didn't seem to allow people to be heard. Except white men. I wish I could say that apology made a difference. Not that I can see. So I'll stop apologizing and remind everyone that we will all be here together until the end of the world and so we need to get better at how we treat one another.
Today.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I once had a boss (male) tell me (female) during a review that I should smile more. I was astonished and asked him if he would say that to a man, but I don't think he got it.