Thursday, October 11, 2012

Got Gas?

Our governor, Jerry Brown, has decided to take action on the way that gas prices have begun to spiral ever-upward in the past few weeks. Californians have been subjected to five dollar a gallon gasoline. In order to stem this tide, Governor Brown has ordered state smog regulators to allow winter-blend gasoline to be sold in California earlier than usual. This means that the supply, which had been limited by explosions and malfunctions at major refineries, will continue to flow. This comes as sweet relief to taxi drivers and pizza delivery drivers, whose business relies on a steady flow of gas into their tanks.
Why don't we raise the price of pizza to cover the price of gas? The kind we put in our tanks, that is. Why not raise the price on the meter for your average fare? Doesn't sound fair? How about drivers in Europe, where they are paying nine dollars a gallon? Like the old National Lampoon Public Disservice message: "Don't send CARE packages to starving families in Europe.Can you afford to live in Europe? No. You can't even afford to visit Europe. And do you know what they do with your CARE packages? They whack them with their polo mallets, and kick them into their swimming pools and have a good laugh at your expense."
Can you afford to drive in the United States? No? Then stop. Don't use "winter blend," which I believe comes with a tiny bit of fresh nutmeg ground into it. Ride the bus. Ride a bike. Or pay five dollars a gallon and be happy about stimulating our sluggish economy.

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