Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Criminal Brain

A friend of mine was marveling this past weekend at the sheer number of television shows centered on the solution of crimes via chemical or biological evidence. Crime scene investigation is hot, hot, hot right now, much to the chagrin of two would-be bank robbers here in the bay area.
Last October 15, Donte Maurice Turner and Sterling Isaac Garner robbed the U.S. Bank on Clayton Road in Concord at gunpoint and fled with six thousand eight hundred and eighty-nine dollars. Witnesses saw two men running through the parking lot of a nearby store. One man was carrying a black bag that was "emitting smoke" from a dye-pack device. Police who were called to the scene found a large amount of dye-stained money, two exploded dye packs, two baseball caps, a black "High School Musical" bag with red dye stains and a pair of gloves.
Here comes the science part: A crime lab processed the baseball caps and matched DNA to Turner and Garner. Apparently, even if you don't break a sweat when you're robbing a bank, you still leave little bits of yourself behind on your clothes, or in this case, your hat. Confronted with the weight of his molecular evidence, Garner confessed to the robbery and told authorities that he was "yelled at" by his partner for dropping the money when the dye packs exploded, because the cash "could have been cleaned with alcohol."
And now, the Punch Line: Garner, who is currently serving time in an Oakland jail, lists his occupation as "crime-scene cleaner."

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

They should have used a "High School Musical 2" bags. Nobody cares about those.

I heart Troy, by the way.